Instead of posting one of my own blogs today, I'm sharing with you one of the best blog series I've read. Matt Smith, President of The A-Game, has written "The Break Up Blog Series" and this is Part One of that series (which will soon be appearing on Talent Revolution). I hope you enjoy it as much as I have!

The Break Up
Like millions of other Americans, I recently had the pleasure of breaking up with my employer. Some call it being laid off, a reduction in force, trimming the fat, whatever you choose, it feels like the time my first girlfriend broke up with me after a whopping 3 weeks of dating.

I made a commitment, honored that commitment to it’s fullest and still, my partner, my company felt they had to “let me go”.

Now, I don’t want to sound like a jilted ex, but this is the first time I have had a company break up with me and frankly, it did hurt just a little. I’m sure that just like that girl that I dated for two weeks before being ABSOLUTELY sure that I loved her enough to tell her, I’ll get over it, but I now know it’s an experience I’ll remember for a long time.

It definitely felt just like breaking up with that girlfriend too…the CEO of my company made a special point to schedule a lunch meeting and even through a 2 hour flight delay, persisted on still meeting at 3pm in the afternoon at a pretty nice restaurant for lunch.

We had some small talk, but you could cut the angst in the air with a butter knife. Then, she laid it on me, very gracefully. I of course said that while it’s hard, I understand her point of view, then we both cried a bit and came out saying we would still “be friends” and support each others work.

Over the next few days, while in mourning, I talked to my support network and told them how I felt, they all first laughed, then said, “you need to share this experience to help others in the same boat.” So, instead of joining the bitter ex club to share stories of break up trite, I thought it would be best to share some thoughts that have helped me move on.

Whether you have just been dumped by your company, are in the place where you have to kick some employees to the curb or just interested in how millions in our country feel, I hope you’ll join me over the next few weeks and share your thoughts.

Written by Matt Smith, President of The A-Game

Views: 8

Tags: a, break, game, laid, matt, network, off, smith, the, up

Comment

You need to be a member of FohBoh to add comments!

Join FohBoh

Comment by Andy Swingley on April 1, 2009 at 7:27pm
Thanks to Matt AND Amanda for the post. This is exact feeling that Matt describes is the fear that keeps all of us engaged in our current positions and puts us on the defense at work which eventually gets us moving on one way or another.

Social media and networking are the employment insurance that should produce a feeling of security for all of us engaged here!

Non-Operator
Comment by Keith Bernhardt on April 1, 2009 at 4:56pm
Amanda,
Thanks for introducing us to Matt.
Excellent writing.

Keith

Non-Operator
Comment by Mark Frank on March 31, 2009 at 5:51pm
Amanda/Matt,

Interesting Blog. Thank you Amanda for sharing. I do feel and believe it’s natural to go through the emotional gamut as one faces the reality of layoff, termination, whatever it might be called. While you are correct there's no use crying over what you can’t change, I do think there is some legitimacy in going through the mourning process. The longer one is unemployed and the deeper one has to go into savings, borrowing, and/or deficit spending, whatever, the more negative feelings about the employer surface. Unemployment for many is an emotional rollercoaster with some good days and some bad.

I suppose there are many legitimate ways of dealing with loss; most have to go through a process of restarting and reemerging from job loss. Most of us pour ourselves into our work and when termination happens it’s a personal violation. Intellectually we all understand circumstance dictates feelings and it sounds as if your employer at least had the common decency of handing your separation/layoff/termination in a dignified and professional manner.

There are many variables in how this (termination/layoff) is executed by companies and therefore no pat response is right for every circumstance. The one point I would absolutely agree with you on and that is the need to move on quickly and channel energy more productively.

Mark

Non-Operator
Comment by Matt Smith on March 31, 2009 at 3:59pm
Paul- Great advice and thanks for the comment! The counseling (or coaching) piece really is a great help...might just talk about that in another post:)

Non-Operator
Comment by Paul Green on March 31, 2009 at 3:18pm
The comparison of a personal break-up and a business break-up is an apt analogy. The ensuing emotional and psychological impact, in dealing with feelings of inadequacy, fear for the future, anxiety, and depression, is difficult to deal with.


The strain of keeping up a brave front can be very wearing. I print this not as doom and gloom comment, but as someone who has faced the predicament.

Staying positive requires a support group; successfully negotiating the mourning and the above-mentioned issues can be helped with more personal counseling.

I took it hard. I had given my all and felt a deep rejection. I did, however, make it to the other side..............with a little help from my friends
Comment by Andrea Case on March 31, 2009 at 2:49pm
I am so glad you shared this Amanda as I am one of those that recently experienced a "break up" with my employer. It serves no purpose to be bitter because that will only be displayed in further actions of trying to land another job. Things happen for a reason and you must stay positive, which is what I am doing. I appreciate the share of this post.

Advertisments

 

DEPARTMENTS

Social Wine Club for Craft Wineries

Smartbrief

The Sip

The Sip: Stay up-to-date on the beer, wine and spirits category with original content from SmartBrief -More

New food offerings helped Starbucks boost sales

Baked goods, breakfast sandwiches and the first price increases in nearly four years helped lead Starbucks to a 7% same-store -More

JOBS & CAREERS

Posting a job or finding a job starts here at FohBoh. Call us about special $50 posting packages to syndicate across all major jobs boards.

National News

Ward Whitworth Named President for On The Border Mexican Grill

On The Border Mexican Grill & Cantina, which was recently acquired by Border Holdings, LLC, an affiliate of Argonne Capital Group, today announced the appointment of Ward Whitworth as President of On The Border.

The Melting Pot Targets Houston and El Paso, Texas for Franchise Expansion

Restaurants, Inc. announced today that it is actively seeking franchisees to expand its presence throughout the Lone Star State, naming El Paso and Houston as target markets for future franchise development.

Encore Restaurants Purchases 8 Existing Five Guys Restaurants, Plans to Develop 45 More

Encore Restaurants, LLC, a subsidiary of Dallas-based Encore Enterprises, Inc., has announced the purchase of eight existing Five Guys Burgers and Fries restaurants across central California including Elk Grove, Fresno, Lodi, Natomas, Roseville, Stockton, Tracy, and West Sacramento.

Takeout Orders to Hotels Jumped 125% in Popularity in Last Three Years

For many Americans, hotel room service is considered a travel luxury; however, data from PFK Hospitality Research1 suggests that room service revenues fell 9.5 percent from 2007 to 2012, with some hotels shuttering unprofitable operations altogether.

National Restaurant Association Praises House and Senate Commerce Committee Passage of Travel Promotion Act

Yesterday the National Restaurant Association (NRA) praised the House passage and Senate Commerce Committee markup of the Travel Promotion, Enhancement and Modernization Act of 2014. The bipartisan legislation reauthorizes Brand USA, the nation’s first global marketing campaign, to promote the United States as a destination for international travelers.

CROWD FUNDING

If you are looking for capital to start or grow your restaurant, create the next 501c3, develop and launch the next app for the restaurant industry,or want to help your peers in some meaningful way, we want to know about it.

TED TALKS VIDEO

TED: Ze Frank: Are you human? - Ze Frank (2014)

Have you ever wondered: Am I a human being? Ze Frank suggests a series of simple questions that will determine this. Please relax and follow the prompts. Let's begin …

TED: Heather Barnett: What humans can learn from semi-intelligent slime - Heather Barnett (2014)

Inspired by biological design and self-organizing systems, artist Heather Barnett co-creates with physarum polycephalum, a eukaryotic microorganism that lives in cool, moist areas. What can people learn from the semi-intelligent slime mold? Watch this talk to find out.

TED: Shih Chieh Huang: Sculptures that’d be at home in the deep sea - Shih Chieh Huang (2014)

When he was young, artist Shih Chieh Huang loved taking toys apart and perusing the aisles of night markets in Taiwan for unexpected objects. Today, this TED Fellow creates madcap sculptures that seem to have a life of their own—with eyes that blink, tentacles that unfurl and parts that light up like bioluminescent sea creatures.

TED: Nikolai Begg: A tool to fix one of the most dangerous moments in surgery - Nikolai Begg (2013)

Surgeons are required every day to puncture human skin before procedures — with the risk of damaging what's on the other side. In a fascinating talk, find out how mechanical engineer Nikolai Begg is using physics to update an important medical device, called the trocar, and improve one of the most dangerous moments in many common surgeries.

© 2014   Created by FohBoh.

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service